Erra by Poppet
How did this book get 24 5-star ratings? First of all, it reads as if it was written by a schizophrenic. Seriously, I hereby dub Poppet the Queen of Fragmented, Incoherent Sentences. Maybe it’s just this one book, but damn, she has worked hard for that title! Erra is the first book I’ve ever bought that I have not been able to finish and here are three examples as to why.
1.) Excerpt: “Is someone bothering you?”
Yes actually, the son of my dead boss seems to want to find me, so please let go so I can get out of here before he sees me.
But instead my throat has ceased.
Her throat has ceased? Seriously? How does a throat cease? Do you mean seized as in seized up, or ceased as in ceased to function? Nope, neither one. It’s just ceased. Right out of the middle of her neck. Gone.
How about this little beauty, 2.) And off we go, trotting like two horses about to start fillying about.
Fillying about? Is this slang for frolicking? He’s walking her to her car to avoid a stalker and she wants to start frolicking with some stranger she only just met?! How many ladies do you know who would react like this when they’re being followed by someone creepy?!
3.) On page one, she refers to her hero as The Hulk. On page two, he’s Mr Capable. On page three, he’s Mr Lickable. This girl needs some serious medication or the author needs a baby name book so she can actually name some of the characters in this story.
I made it as far as the third chapter and then had to give up. This is one giant cliche after fragmented sentence after confusing I-don’t-know-it-might-be-slang after cliche again. The whole thing reads like a pulp-knock-off Dick Tracy comic, it is that bad.